Whiskey and Fire
by Silver Damascus
Summary: No more status reports she didn‘t need, no bounce in his step as he rushed to tell her about whatever new toy the science department was playing with now. Just solemn eyes and a withering frame. So much change...
1. Chapter 1

-1The darkness could be comforting, it could also be oppressing. Tonight, with the cool of the ocean around her and only the murmurings of Atlantis in the air Elizabeth Weir wasn't quite sure what she felt. At the very least, she sighed, it was quiet.

After almost a week the ghosts of their latest adventure were beginning to fade. Another invasion, this time from an unknown enemy, appearing out of nowhere like the bogeyman and trying to steal their city away. Another enemy, another joyless victory. At this rate it would take nothing less than divine inspiration to keep them all safe and well. It had taken a few short hours for her people to rise up and defeat those who had invaded their home but that short time had cost them dearly.

Beckett's infirmary held many injured bodies that would awake groaning in the morning; Dr Biro's held three that would not. Three lives. That was the cost for keeping the city. It was a rather cynical to think of paying rent with lives but nevertheless some nights she did. Others, she wondered how much that price would rise and in the end whether even one was worth it.

It wasn't even the entire price. Not content with taking the city, their invaders had tortured everyone they could get their hands on, not physically, no, they were far more advanced than that. A little piece of metal into the side of their skull and the seven poor souls they'd captured were reliving the worst moments of their life. She'd held it in her hand as she looked at the broken forms of her people. So much pain from such a little thing.

Everyone who had suffered that was sent to Dr. Heitmeyer who said they were progressing, gradually. All except one.

Radek had refused to speak to her. Eventually Elizabeth asked him personally if he would go, just to try, he didn't have to speak about anything he didn't want to and then, with a hand on his arm, told him she was worried for him. As she thought it might, it had worked and he went. He went and sat in absolute silence for an hour.

Rodney's way of trying to cope with Radek's shift in personality was to attack the examination of the device as if it were wholly and maliciously responsible for everything that had every gone wrong in his entire life. Working with the desperate belief that somehow if he could just figure it out everything would be ok again.

He couldn't though. There wasn't much left over to begin with and what little they had to examine was far too delicate. Only one thing was certain, that it was neither Ancient nor Wraith and far beyond their own level of technology. Yet another thing to worry about.

At least Rodney hadn't needed any encouragement to go and see Dr. Heitmeyer. He walked in and talk for an hour, from the moment the door closed to the moment it opened again she didn't get a word in edgeways.

Elizabeth entered the kitchen in the dark and flipped the switch on the kettle before she tapped the switch for the light. Something didn't feel right. She wasn't alone in the room.

Light flashed in her eyes, pain exploded in her head.


	2. Chapter 2

-1

She flung her hands over her eyes to try and block the light, trying to push the pain in her head out of her mind. The presence - focus, she scorned herself, squinting into the light. A shadow. Attacker! Her mind screamed. Tensing she spun to confront it and found it assembling in the form of a figure hunched over one of the tables, the only vaguely threatening movement it was making was the vehemence with which it flung its arms around its head, she assumed, to fend off the light.

A small form with very wild hair.

"Dr Zelenka?" she asked.

The groan may have been something in Czech, either that or a snarl to accompany the hate filled glare he flung in her general direction.

The over heads finally spluttered to life illuminating a quarter gone bottle of whiskey in the middle of the table and a cup before him.

He squinted up at her through wilder than usual hair.

"Dr Weir?" he groaned

"…You're up late."

The look of distain in his eyes at her statement was almost enough to make her flinch.

So much change.

No more status reports she didn't need, no bounce in his step as he came to tell her of whatever new toy the science department was playing with now. No bickering back at Rodney or any smiles and lights in his eyes when she talked to him. She was surprised to discover how much she had missed it and she knew she wasn't the only one to have discovered that. Earlier she was relieved to know the ghosts of their encounter with the enemy was fading but they had created another ghost as well, one that she didn't want to fade any further.

The kettle came to a swift boil and in silence she made the tea.

Radek didn't move as she took the seat opposite him and watched him in silence. He looked lost to the world, his eyes downcast and far away, staring as if somehow he could see through the table and the floors beneath them and deep down into the oceans.

"Here," she said in her softest tone, placing a mug of tea on front of him. "you look like you could use it."

He didn't move, not even a blink of the eyes to show he heard her speak. She reached out and placed her hands over his, gently taking them away from the cup. He offered no resistance at all, almost like a sleeping child as he allowed her to move him and place the mug of fresh tea into his hands. He sighed and blinked as he felt the warmth against his palms.

"Warm." he whispered.

"Best way for tea."

"Thank you," he whispered and rewarded her with the ghost of a smile. She let his words linger in the air for as long as she could, waiting until the moment she was uncertain whether he had really spoken or not.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

She inwardly braced herself for the snarl of his reply, finding herself almost pleading for it. At least when he was angry he was here.

"Much like I look I imagine," he answered.

Elizabeth wanted to reach out and touch him, to offer a grasp of support over his hand or to tuck back some of the hair veiling his face. Instead she paused for a moment and then asked, with what she hoped was the same sincerity as she felt:

"Is there anything that I can do?"

He lifted his head up and turned his eyes to meet her for the first time. The corners were red and dry as if all the white and moisture had been sucked into pale, almost translucent iris. What was that in his eyes? Pain, sorrow…pleading? He closed his eyes and dipped his head, brow tightened. He gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head.

"…thank you for asking."

She moved to the bottle of whiskey and turned it towards her to examine the label. The very fact that it had a label indicating it was not Zelenka's usual brand.

"Scots malt whiskey," she read "eighteen years."

"Gift from Doctor Beckett." he explained.

"That's a fine gift."

"Generous man," nodded Zelenka.

"I'm not quite sure its what I want him handing out, its not quite world health approved."

"I would imagine it is from his personal supplies."

"I'm not quite sure if that's reassuring or not."

Radek let out a small snort. The smile on his lips seemed real enough but it never quite reached those eyes.

They lapsed into silence again, less awkward this time but something wasn't right. The silence of the room was a little too true, aside from the hum of Atlantis there was no other noise, something was missing…Ticking, there was no ticking sound in the room. She looked towards the wall where the clock usually hung to find it torn rather expertly into the various pieces scattered on the floor. She raised an eyebrow and looked at Zelenka in askance.

"Ticking clocks annoy me." he answered.

"Remind me never to do the same."

He closed his eyes and raised the cup of tea to his mouth and took a delicate sip.

"Radek, have you tried speaking with Dr. Heitmeyer again?"

"Didn't try first time round."

"Yes, I know." she let a little irritation creep into her voice.

"I did what you asked."

"Yes, Radek. You did exactly what I asked. Not what I meant. Sitting in Dr. Heitmeyer's office refusing to speak to her for an hour isn't going to do any good."

"I could have told you that before you sent me there. I thought session were meant to be confidential are they not?"

"You didn't say anything to be kept as confidential."

"Dr. Weir -"

"Radek, I didn't ask you to do this as your boss, I asked you as a friend."

"And because you asked me I went. I went because it would make you feel better, not me. I have no desire to spill my pains to someone whose job it is to sit there and listen to it, however much she pretends to care."

"I don't think Kate just pretends Radek."

"Maybe she doesn't, in fact no. I'm sure she cares about her job very much, it is her job to care. Am I the only person who sees that as cold? I have no desire to speak to someone about matters close to my heart when they are so far removed from it…and I from theirs."

"Radek?" she asked softly, "would you talk to me?"


End file.
